Dream

I had another weird dream last night. I lived in a different house, in a different town, and in what seemed like a different time. The dream time/place in which I lived was reminiscent of the Goon Docks from Goonies.

Anyway, in my dream the world was coming to an end. Not a violent end. Not a religious end. Just and end, and everyone knew about it. It was understood and it was sad, but everyone knew that at midnight on a certain night, approaching rapidly, the world would stop, and so would all of the people in it. Everyone was pretty much resigned and peaceful about the whole ordeal; I suppose because they couldn't do anything about it. There was no science that could find a new planet, no engineering that could redirect an errant asteroid, and no prayer to a long forgotten god that could stop the end. So everyone pretty much went about their lives.

Now, I have a wife and two children and in my dreams it was the same. But for some reason, on the last day, I got it in my head that I wanted to be at Cartoon Network when it all went into the crapper, and not with my family. So, as the last day is winding down I hop in the car and head on into the city.

Luckily I had an epiphany before it was too late and I realized I would rather be with my family when it ends than with some strangers. So I turn my car around and headed home, with barely enough time to get back.

Then, on the way home, the solution occurred to me. For some reason I realized that the world was comming to an end because, by some stroke of chance, all of the VCR in creation were set to the same time and were properly functioning. So when all the clocks reached midnight at the same time it would cause some kind of cosmic fart and we'd all stop.

The solution then became clear. All I had to do was reset our VCR clock. Then they would not all be the same and life would go on. There was a catch, however. When I got home my wife did not want me to mess with the VCR. She understood my explanation and the purpose it would serve. But she had the VCR set to record the end of the world and she didn't want to miss it. Furthermore, the VCR clock was finally right and she did not think to highly of intentionally miss-setting it. Afterall, if all it took to end the world was everyone's clock being right, what was the guarantee this wouldn't happen again.

In spite of my wife's protests I reset the clock. But did I get to reap the benefits of saving mankind? Did I get a huge house and a key to the universe? No. I got to wake up because my bladder was full.

So, I think it is important for all of you out there to know that I saved the world last night. A little gratitude would be appreciated.