No excuse New Haircut!

I have no excuse for why I am so late with this latest installment. I'm just sending it out today. I will post it on Monday.

If it's any consolation I got a haircut this week. It looks sweet. And the best part was this barber was clever. She did NOT hand me the mirror and ask me too inspect the back. See, I don't have the copious amounts of hair I once had. And while I don't exactly have a complex about my hair loss, I don't want to be reminded of it by a hair dresser. It makes me want to say, "Oh yeah, thanks for pointing out that I don't have much hair back there. That means you didn't have as much work to do. That means that you don't need as much tip."

But this lady was good. She cut my hair like I like it and she didn't let me look at the back. Kudos to her.

When I was approximately 23 years old I was first confronted about my hair. I went to a Great Clips in Athens and I saw this little oriental lady. I only went in for a trim because back in those days I had long hair. And by long hair I mean it went half way down my back. I'd show you pictures, but I'm a little embarrassed to admit that I had a mustache. I'm not ashamed of the hair. I'm kinda ashamed of the 'stache. It looked decent when I had the long hair. Kinda piratey. But I kept the mustache long after I got rid of the hair. But anyway, I digress.

So I had long hair and a mustache and I went to Great Clips. I was not married yet. I'm not sure if that matters. So I sit down to have this lady trim my hair, shave my neck and the typical things to make long hair on a guy somewhat presentable. And she did them all. But as she was cutting my hair she said, in a typical oriental accent, "You going bald."

"No, I'm not," I said calmly. "I have a wide part. It has always been that way." This last fact was not just me rationalizing. I had always had a pretty big part. But, I hadn't looked at the back of my head in years. Why would I?

Anyway, the lady was persistent. "No, you go bald. You losing hair."
"No," I said. "That is the way my hair has always been."
"You always lose hair like this?" she said loud enough for everyone to hear and then held up a handful of hair, some of which I could tell wasn't mine. "You going bald. You losing hair."
"I'm not going bald," I said, trying to keep her quiet.
"Oh yeah," she said. "Look," and she held up the mirror.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"
It was true. My part had never been that big before. It was enormous! I was bald! Well, not yet, but I was going bald! I was turning into a hideous bald person!

I was depressed from that point on.

I wasn't really bald at that point. I was only bald enough for an oriental hair dresser to notice. But it was coming. Slowly but surely. Even now I am not techncially bald, but I don't have as much up top as I once did. Every once in a while a friend or family member will say, "Yep, it's really getting thin up there isn't it." That's why I don't have many friends or family members.

In retrospect I think that lady must have been some kind of ancient oriental demon with an elemental power over hair. I don't think she liked me because I was the essence of goodness and purity, so she cursed me to have perpetually thinning hair. I should probably see an exorcist.